In my three years of being a parent, I have learned that there is a sort of "irony of time" that exists. In one moment, I can be cursing a stage my children are in, desperate for it to pass, while, at the same time, lamenting how quickly time seems to be slipping away. Like every well-intentioned parent, I purchased baby books, keep a mommy journal and write this blog as a way to keep track of life. And, actually, I have been pretty good about recording events, moments, firsts. I even try to take note of the seemingly mundane, a typical day here, a funny story there, as an attempt to capture our daily adventures. What I have found, however, is that I didn't record things I thought I did, so now, with baby #2 here, I am challenging myself to remember what Henry did when.
Like most parents of newborns, sleep is our issue. I am a huge proponent of fostering healthy sleep habits in kids. I strongly believe that behavior is very much related to sleep (or lack of), so I am pretty strict about sleep schedules around here. We worked hard to get Henry to be a good sleeper. He goes to bed early, sleeps until 7 am, and naps well. (Now that he is almost three, naps are a bit more unpredictable, but we still put him down for a nap each day.) We're almost at the 4 month mark with Mitch. I feel the need to write this post, if only so I remember what we did when, in case we decide to have another child.
Starting at 3 months, we began letting Mitch fuss a bit before he fell asleep. At around 3.5 months, we let him cry in 5 minute intervals in order to fall asleep at naps/night. He caught on quickly.
But now we've hit a plateau. At his last well-visit, our ped. said he could go longer between feeds at night. I know this is true, but it's hard because he still needs to eat a couple of times, and it's challenging to determine when that is. I do know that some of the times he's waking, it's because he's not next to me. I would bring him to bed around 3 am; any nursing mother knows that it's likely I'll fall asleep nursing anyway, so I'd rather be in my bed. But, it does have the potential of creating a co-sleeping habit. I am not against co-sleeping in general, but, personally, I don't want to have a co-sleeper.
Anywho, so back to the plateau...Mitch is soooo restless beginning around 3 or 4 a.m. and it's exhausting. I know, eventually, his brain will develop more and he'll sleep better at that time, but, right now it's tough. And so I am in that weird irony of time. I long for nights of uninterrupted sleep, but I know it'll mean that Mitch is growing up. Cliches exist for a reason, and the one about how quickly the time of raising children goes is true. So, maybe this post is more than a memo of "what my baby did at 4 months" and, instead, is a reminder that I need to enjoy the stage, rather than being ready to move onto the next big thing.
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3 comments:
I worry about all of this, too, since I was not a great record keeper of sleep stuff. But you have the right attitude about it: it's okay to be tired and long for a restful night as long as you realize it will be over all too soon and do your best to appreciate all your time with Mitch. It's probably a lot easier for you to think like this as you watch your almost three year old!
Okay, I know that you are trying to hold onto the precious moments & not wish time away ... and that's important. But I have to say, Elliot has finally, after almost 2 1/2 years, slept from 9pm-5am, and there is no lamenting his growing up on my part. That said, so many things about babies are sweet and endearing even while being frustrating. The moment when I was constantly trying to shift perspective was getting up to nurse in the middle of the night. I frequently took a deep breath and told myself that someday I would miss those quiet, intimate moments in the middle of the night. Someday. Good luck!!
Em,
If Henry didn't sleep on his own until he was 2.5, I would be in the same boat! I am actually probably even more tolerant of crying/sleep training this time around (and we did it with Henry at 9 months to sleep through the night). I was actually ready to start it in order for Mitch to fall asleep much sooner. I am def. not an attachment parenter in that regard. ;) But, it's hard with the middle of the night waking b/c it's tough to differentiate b/t waking for hunger and waking out of habit. Tough. I think the post was more of a reminder to have an attitude adj. about the whole thing--hard to do at 3 am.
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